By Dr. Dina Evan

 

Happy Hearts Day!

The jewelry stores have bumped up prices and department stores have brought out their bestselling perfumes, and every department has gone back through their sales records to see what items have sold the best on every Valentine’s Day for the past 10 years.

 

Ahh yes, this is Cupids month!

However, in a world feeling bereft of love and focused on division and insult, attack and dominance, I began to wonder what would happen if this was simply world love day and not just reserved only for our romantic partners.

On Christmas, love is often measured by the number of presents under the tree. Easter is often about how many eggs we can find in the yard and, on Valentines Day it is often about how big the gift is and how much it costs. So let’s make this month simply about love, for everyone! 

Now that doesn’t mean you can’t do something astonishingly romantic for that special person in your life. But, how would it feel to expand Valentine’s Day a bit  After all, the only way to change the world is if we change….right?

In my life, the people I loved and respected the most were those who were present, honest, truthful and showed up with love. So why don’t we do exactly that? What might happen if you took that elderly lady who lives alone down the street a pastry with a card that reads, “Thank you for bringing your sweet energy to our street. Wishing you the best on Valentine day.”

Or, to our grandparents, whom I can attest to are often forgotten after kids and grandkids have their own kids and their plates are filled survival and making the money to support them. Today’s consciousness is about play, time for friends, vacations, lunches and movies, there’s no time for grandmothers and grandfathers. Maybe because their tool boxes were empty, in our day/ their day, we made it a point not to burden our kids with how hard it was. So, how about a single flower with a note that says, “Thank you for going through all you did to keep our family together and make it possible for us to be who we are today.”

And how about teachers, like my beloved 4th grade teacher, Ms. Franklin. I grew up in an empty room and had no idea who I was. No direction, no self-awareness, and no self-esteem…until Ms. Franklin. One day I was sitting alone on a bench on the playground and here she came in her high top, tied up shoes, her old 20’s looking dresses that were very long and dark and her foreboding look that always seemed to always silently say…don’t you dare anything. She took a seat beside me and said,  “Okay Dina, it’s time to stop acting as if you are not smart. You are very smart and I expect you to show that in your work and on our class from this day on. Do you understand me?” It took me a minute to grasp what she had actually said to me and, I must have looked dumb founded. She said, crisply albeit wrapped in a silent humanity, “Did you hear me?” I nodded. And she replied, “Good then from this day forward I expect only the best from you and do not hold back.“  I don’t remember walking home that day. I just remember her words – words, I had never heard before and I dared to believe. After all she was Ms. Franklin and she knows everything! I wish she was here today to say thank you, but clearly many teachers, nurses, and other service people, today deserve the same.

 

Love is love, no matter who you give it to

Whether it’s that woman in the grocery store who is a couple of dollars short for her order, or that waitress who works hard to take care of her child, or the grocery store clerk. A little love goes a long way and since it’s very inexpensive …let’s spread it around this Valentine’s Day and make some special person’s heart happy. You in?

 

Dr. Evan is a marriage, family, child therapist and consciousness counselor. She has presented nationwide seminars and workshops, written several books and created meditation CDs for couples, individual and mental health professionals. Visit drdinaevan.com or call 602-571-8228.