By Dr. Dina Evan
I haven’t lived forever, however at my age, and at this time in our history, it sometimes feels that way. Even so, I don’t believe we have ever faced more challenging times than these, and nor do I believe we ever will again in the future. These are times that call for extraordinary courage and compassion because everywhere you look there is challenge, heartache and pain.
For instance, my dear friend Stephanie just had her long awaited first child five months ago and last week she got a shocking diagnosis of stage four cancer.
We sit together and explore what this holy moment is here to teach us. She cries softly and I remind her and myself to breathe.
It’s same nauseating feeling that caught my breath away watching as soldiers in lock step unload thirteen caskets off a plane — thirteen precious warriors killed only one day before coming home from Afghanistan. The same feeling when I listened as the newscaster who said our hospitals cannot take any critical patients because they are filled and over flowing with children who caught Covid from the unvaccinated adults in their lives who believed the lies rather than the science.
So what are these horrific times that push our souls forward, here to teach us?
FIRST… to breathe even when it feels as if life is taking our breath away. We have to let the suffering out on every next exhale to make room for whatever is life affirming, and there is so much of that as well.
For instance, the laughter of children and grandchildren, the love of partners who find each other, the wheelchair that takes the healed patient to his or her car, the hope we cling to and empower that those of us who know this will someday pass, cling to so tightly. Add to that, the joy that comes from watching demonstrators who respectfully gather to demonstrate and speak up and out for us, for equality for everyone, every gender, every life choice and every human being.
We are also being taught to stay in the moment and stop the fear that pushes us toward future scaping out and away from the feelings. These are the feelings that empower our humanity and compassion. They light up our courage and ask us to dig deep and find the very best of who we are. They ask us to stop looking outward and begin looking inside to discover our courage, our values and our integrity. They make us ask question we have been too asleep to ask. They make us give answers we once thought were not important but now see are lifesaving. They help us realize that the color of our blood and the nature of our challenges are the same color and kind as the person sitting next to us whose skin color may be different than ours.
These times teach us that our fears and feelings are normal and not to be judged. They are human and reasonable, and deserve understanding, acceptance and compassion both for ourselves and each other.
These are the trials and times that reflect back to us our courage and our inner strength. They ask more of us and they call forth the kind of fortitude that we seldom exercise. Without these challenges we could never know how truly strong and compassionate we are.
Most of all they ask us to stand up and speak up with the solutions that are motivated by what love would do, not what separation chooses.
No, instead, we are called to honor our deepest values, our deepest love for our country, the world and each other.
We are called to act, to trust and to believe that all things are possible.
We are asked to come home to our spiritual, conscious selves, and be who we came here to be and do what we came here to do.
And so lets begin, and if you feel motivated and have the ability and desire to make a difference where we can, please also make a contribution to my friend Stephanie’s GoFundMe page so she can get the treatment she needs to live a long life and be here for her precious baby girl at
https://gofund.me/cf2437ce and say a little prayer for her and all of us and then relax and …just breathe.
Dr. Evan is a marriage, family, child therapist and consciousness counselor. She has presented nationwide seminars and workshops, written several books and created meditation CDs for couples, individual and mental health professionals. She has also won national acclaim as a human rights advocate. Visit drdinaevan.com or call 602-571-8228.
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