Addiction does not take a break from wanting to destroy and take a life if it can. While this time of year is happy and joyful in many ways, it can also be a time when sadness, loneliness, isolation and depression sets in. Many of us grew up with the Hallmark card image of the holidays, yet never experienced it. I didn’t. When active in my drinking and using, this time of year was another great excuse for going “overboard.” Lying to myself and others. Oh, I just wanted to be part of the celebrations — but that rarely happened. Every time I drank I blacked out. I embarrassed myself, was overwhelmed with shame and concocted lies upon lies on to who was to blame for my behaviors. It was nothing short of a nightmare existence.
Like many others, in early recovery I wondered if I would ever have fun again — then I realized I never experienced true fun at all under any influence.
The heartfelt laughter, camaraderie and happiness comes from surrounding myself with like minded people in recovery who band together like family. If you are new to recovery or not; during this time of the year — stay with the people who will support you in sobriety. There are many of us to reach out to, we are your family.
Wishing you peace, joy and gratitude this season. Barbara
Email me at aztogether@yahoo.com
This issue of Together AZ is dedicated to the memory of Guy Davidson, John Bradshaw, Deanna Brown, Sally Lara, Pat Mellody and our founder, Bill Brown.
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