Characters, Including You

I am a character. I have always known I was different. I always felt I played outside of everyone else’s circle. I thought it was because I grew up in an empty room, had middle child syndrome, or was just born weird. I had no idea how much of a character I was until a client, who after a particularly tearful session, paused at the doorway and turned around to flip me a bird, and softly say, Thank you.” She knew I would get it and her because she too was a character.

I have no illusion that my truth is the truth. It’s just my truth, and most of the time after 30 plus years of counseling, and all the truth my college courses didn’t teach me, but my clients did — usually hits home. I love the truth. Truth has the same vibrational frequency as love. The truth always heals. It’s not always comfortable, but it is always healing, and that’s a truth you can count on that is universal.

Another truth that is valuable, is that without characters in our world, not only would life be boring, but, in addition, we would never learn anything about who we are at a core level. Whenever we have an encounter with a character, it is your response to that person that gives you a peek into your own integrity and need for sameness.

• Do we judge?
• Do we feel uncomfortable?
• Do we want the person to change so we can be comfortable?
• Do we try to emulate him or her?
• Do we see his or her presence in our life as a gift?

There is so much to learn, and so many gifts if we are aware enough to notice.

There are many different kinds of characters in the world. Some are on the lower end of the consciousness frequency who are only concerned with their own survival, material wealth and physical beauty. Depending upon our response to them, we can get a peek at our tendencies to become envious and resentful. We can decide the world is unfair instead of creating what we really want in our own lives.

Then, there are the characters who are crass, loathsome and often down right bullies, with personality traits we hate. We forget those traits are born from the maiming of a childhood, their own insecurities or lack of self-esteem. These characters teach us forgiveness and acceptance even in the face of the immediate need for showers and deep gut efforts not to fight back. We may label these characters as unworthy or unlovable …or we could wonder what pain they are in that causes their perception of life and reflect back understanding instead of loathing.

There are the characters who say the weirdest things, things we have never considered before, things that don’t fit in our wheelhouse of experience. They push us out of complacency and out of the status quo and make us think. I love these folks because they make us question beliefs and thoughts that we may have previously thought to be solid, unshakable truths. I seek these characters out and ask to be shaken. It is so much fun.

So the point of all this is that we can open our hearts and minds and embrace difference, uncertainty, change and characters one and all.

They are master teachers for us and without them life would be boring. No only do I want you to embrace them – look out here it comes —- I want you to be one.

• Stand in your truth.
• Speak your mind.
• Be willing to change.
• Be accepting of difference.

When you feel yourself resisting, be brave enough to ask what it is that you fear. Life gets very exciting when you are brave enough in each moment, each new greeting, each new experience to ask yourself, what is my response to this and why. There is no way to be bored when you do this because this planet and everyone whose life touches yours is someone you have chosen as a teacher, here to teach you something about yourself. They are not here so you can change them. They are here so you can change you. That’s when the ride gets exciting. So go be the character you always knew was in you waiting to get out. We are waiting, and no one else can take your place.

Dr. Evan is a life/soul coach in Arizona working with individuals, couples and corporations.  She  specializes in relationships, personal and professional empowerment, compassion and consciousness. For more information 602-997-1200, email drdbe@attglobal.net or visit www.DrDinaEvan.com.